Obituary

Welcome to 2016

Baggie

I began this first post of the New Year while the house was still in its clinquant finery, unfortunately for you dear readers life has got in the way and I now post it a couple of weeks into January.  However as usual this post is where I sit like the personification of Janus with one eye on the future and one on the year just gone.

I do not think that I can go any further without mentioning the defining family event of the year.  It is always difficult when someone we love passes away; when that person is a much loved husband, father, grandfather, uncle, friend then even more so.  John passed away on Monday 19th October from pleomorphic cell sarcoma, a form of bone cancer.  He had been diagnosed in April after months of investigations into the pain in his shoulder and a loss of control of his arm, and was told it was terminal in September.  So, although not unexpected the relative swiftness of his passing was a shock to us all; a shock that we are all still coming to terms with and no doubt will do for many years to come.

It goes without saying that Granddad’s death has left an enormous hole in our lives and it has also made us think of our own mortality.  It was a testament to the man to see so many people at his funeral; he had touched so many people’s lives and all wanted to pay respect to him.  He was an extremely practical man and although it is right and fitting that we are grieving he would not want us moping around.

This was the first time that the children had to deal with grief.  Indeed it was the first time that Lucinda had to really face bereavement, especially of someone so close.  Thus, it was me that told the girls (Ezra is too young) about their Granddad.  I explained that Granddad had died and asked them if they understood and whether they wanted to ask any questions and I answered them as truthfully as I could.  I assured them that it was fine to cry and to be upset and we sat in a huddle and hugged each other while crying.  I let them see me cry to illustrate that I, too, was upset that Granddad had died and thus there was no shame in crying.

The questions that the girls asked, illustrates the difference between them.  The scientific questions from Éowyn, (‘How do you catch cancer?’, ‘What happens to your body?’ etc.) to the practical from Amélie (‘Who is going to cook me pancakes? ‘Who is going to fix my toys when I break them?’). I answered them as honestly as I could, without going into any dark details, then came the question ‘Is Granddad in heaven?’ ‘Can we go and visit him?’

Now, I may not believe in Heaven, but then again neither do I believe in Father Christmas. Like Father Christmas I am not going to crush the girls’ belief with my adult logic (flawed or otherwise), it is more important for them to believe in the magic. In the same way that the belief in the magic of Christmas is embodied in the personification of Father Christmas then Heaven is a belief in the enduring love of those we have lost.

Please feel free to click here to read my tribute to Granddad, and here if you want to read my ramblings on life and death.  I have also set up a tribute page to John that you can reach by clicking here, you will see that we have raised over £500 for the Sam Beare hospice that looked after John so well.

It is difficult to follow the memory of Granddad’s passing but 2015 has many good memories too and it has been very important year in the life of our second born.  September saw Amélie start full time education.  This is an important step in everybody’s life and so it was for Amélie.  Indeed she has now completed a full term at school and is still enjoying herself.  She gets on well with her teacher, Miss Snow, and as seemingly made some friends.  This was something, that Amélie had put great importance on when she first went to school, and became upset when the other children didn’t seem interested in becoming her friend.  We spoke to miss Snow about this and she said that it was no slight on Amélie moreover it was the fact that Amélie was emotionally more mature that the average reception pupil and so although Amélie was putting great store on building a special relationship, none of the other children were ready for such a commitment.  Notwithstanding the lack of a best friend Amélie is progressing very well and hopefully she can continue this through 2016.

Éowyn continued her journey through the education system moving from Year 1 to Year 2.  She has settled in well to changing school at such a delicate age and has made a number of very good friends, however she has still not forgot her best friend Aaliyah from her previous school.  She has enjoy her extra-curricula activities especially drama.  Indeed Sense Theatre the third party company that taught the after school drama club filmed their summer performance and then arranged a premiere showing where the actors were treated as V.I.P.s.  It was a difficult watch (imagine a school play 2 hours long) but Éowyn thoroughly enjoyed it and we purchased a DVD recording for prosperity, if ever you are suffering from insomnia.

Meanwhile our third born has become a cheeky young man.  He has two older sisters and therefore he has to stick up for himself and that he does rather well; he will not be taken for a fool.  His speech is coming along very well and he will have to look forward to joining his sisters in going to school (or pre-school in his case) in the coming year.  One of Ezra’s biggest steps this last year was his first taste of foreign travel.  Indeed a big step for all of our children.  The Bagnall family holiday (one of two – the other was no less exotic: The Lake District) in 2015 was to visit Sarigerme in Turkey.  This was Ezra’s first flight (which he loved) and the first time that the Baguettes had visited another continent, for although Turkey straddles both Europe and Asia and we were most certainly in Asia.  We feel fortunate that we decided to go to Turkey last year, as although we all loved Turkey and felt safe in the region, with the current sociopolitical situation in Turkey I am not sure that I would want to be taking my family there this summer.

The Baguettes are not the only members of the Bagnall family that have had seen big changes.  2015 saw Lucinda give up her career at the airport, retrain and become a full time Ofsted registered child minder.  It can not be understated how much of a big decision this was and how well Lucinda has adjusted to the change.  You may recall that Lucinda used to work for Air Canada, as ground staff at Heathrow Airport.  However, as is the want in our modern world Air Canada found it too expensive to employ staff at Heathrow but with flights still terminating and originating from such a busy hub they turned to a handling agency to provide this service.  Lucinda took redundancy and took a job with the handling agency.  She worked for ASIG for a year but realised that the job she has done for the previous sixteen years no longer existed and the job was interfering with being there for her children.  Hence the retraining and the child minding.  Child minding is not the easiest of jobs as you are working with children constantly without any adult interaction, but she has got good feedback from the parents of the children thatch looks after which is some comfort that she is doing things right.

This is the last time I will mention it but last year (my twentieth at IMG) was a very good year for winning things.  There has been the Emmy, NBC won the Emmy for Outstanding Technical Team Studio at the 36th Sports Emmy award and were gracious not only to recognise the fact that my department assist them in their technological endeavours but to include me and a number of other IMG staff members on the official list of winners.  I was very touched by this kind gesture and NBC had no obligation to include us in their win nevertheless it means that I am an Emmy winner and entitled to say so in perpetuity (although I promise not to mention it on this website again!); a signed Rugby World Cup ball (thanks England for being the first host team to be eliminated at the group stage heavily deflating any value that it has) but the first, and arguably the best, was the trip to Vienna.

For those of you that can’t quite remember the details: IMG provided facilities to the BBC to produce the 60th Eurovision Song Contest for transmission on BBC 1.  The 2015 contest was hosted in Vienna due to the previous year’s win by the Bearded Lady: Conchita Wurst.  Apparently this hasn’t happened before but it is in the spirit of the competition the Austrian Ambassador hosted a send-off party for the UK entry at the Austrian Embassy.  Invitations were strictly ‘invite only’ and along with the BBC personnel, four of us from IMG were invited to attend.  As we entered the Embassy we were given a raffle ticket.  Never say no to a free raffle ticket:  the top prize being two return flights to Vienna on Austrian Airways and two nights in Das Triest Hotel (and a 1 metre inflatable Austrian Airways jet).  This is what I won.

We decided that we would like to visit Vienna as the winter drew in and the Christmas markets begun, unfortunately weekends in December were filled booked and so we headed to Central Europe mid November.  It came at a good time, a month after Granddad’s passing and allowed us to relax as a couple without trying to make the weekend something more because it has cost us money.  Nevertheless we did managed to take a lot in int he 48 hours or so that we were there including the early Christmas markets.  We thoroughly enjoyed Vienna and would recommend a visit there, and indeed would love to go back.

2015 also saw the Bagnall family grow by two more members.  Chez Bagnall welcomed its first pets in the shape of two guinea pigs:  Toffee and Frazzle.  As this only happened at the end of December we will see how 2016 progresses how the novelty of pet ownership continues with the Baguettes.  Early indicators are favourable but let us revisit this in June.

2015 also saw an additional to the structure of the house itself in the shape of a fireplace and a multi-fuel stove.  The house is big and old and lacks the insulation of modern homes and therefore can sometimes feel quite cold.  Rather than turn the central heating on to heat the entire house when during the day we are all spending time in the lounge the stove should come into its own.  That is the theory anyway and if we are being completely honest the look and feel of a real fire is much more that just the heat it gives off, plus you get to burnt things!

So what will 2016 bring our family.  Hopefully it will be a little more boring.  The last few years have been manic with huge emotional earthquakes.  I think the family could do with just a year that just plods along nothing too stressful or life changing.  That is off course if we survive yet another end of the world prophecy (if you want to read my thoughts on the 2012 prophecy read this).  Apparently we survived the authors own 2015 prophecy and so it is now being pushed to 2016.  I think I am safe to say that you will still be able to read this post in 2017 (if you choose to do so).

So as we leap into 2016 with precious few longterm plans (we have a couple of holidays booked) we hold our heads up high and face the future as a family and I leave you with this thought:

“May Light always surround you;
Hope kindle and rebound you.
May your Hurts turn to Healing;
Your Heart embrace Feeling.
May Wounds become Wisdom;
Every Kindness a Prism.
May Laughter infect you;
Your Passion resurrect you.
May Goodness inspire
your Deepest Desires.
Through all that you Reach For,
May your arms Never Tire.”
― D. Simone

Peace and Love

Baggie

 

And another year over
That’s what I think of posing with my sisters
Looking to the future

Goodnight Granddad

Baggie

It goes without saying that this is a very hard post to write.  Indeed, if this was committed to paper there would be tear stairs making passages illegible.  On Monday 19th October just before 2 o’clock in the afternoon John Cathrall, husband, father, grandfather, friend, passed away at the Princess Alice Hospice in Esher.  John had been diagnosed with pleomorphic cell sarcoma in April and was told it was terminal in September.  Therefore, it was not unexpected however death always comes as a shock, and although it is the one thing that unites us, it seems that our culture tries to avoid the subject.

Somewhat ironically, considering that John was suffering from a terminal diagnosis, he had been in ‘good health’ recently and had been very active.  So the swiftness of his passing, although a blessing, has been hard to accept.  He was taken to Princess Alice Hospice in Esher on Saturday morning and never really regained consciousness.  For the 48 hours he was in the Hospice he was never alone, the family took it in turns to stay with him, even staying overnight on the Saturday and Sunday.  I would like to think that this was a great comfort to John in his finally hours, as although the staff at Princess Alice were fantastic and I can not praise them highly enough, family was very important to John and to be surrounded by his family must have filled him with pride and given him great warmth.

It goes without saying that John has left an enormous hole in our lives.  He was an extremely practical man and although it is right and proper that we are grieving he would not want us moping around, there are things to be done! He worked hard all his life whether that was in his trade as a builder, or upkeep around his own home and garden or the numerous jobs that his children and grandchildren gave him.

Not only did he work hard he played hard too. Not in the sense of cigarettes and alcohol (unless you include ginger beer or the odd pint of shandy) but in entertaining and being the life and soul of the party.  Whether that was being a monster scaring the grandchildren witless or sitting quietly reading a story with grandchildren on his knee, introducing a new generation to Tom and Jerry cartoons or offering tractor trailer rides around his garden.

He had a love of engineering and mechanics that transcended his hobbies, be that gliding, repairing tractors or his love of steam engines.  He was always there for advice, whether you wanted it or not, but you would have been a fool to dismiss any DIY advice and I personally learned some new techniques from the man. As Amélie said, ‘Who am I going to get to repair my toys now?’

I only knew John for 11 years but I looked upon him as the father that I missed growing into adulthood. This short essay does not do justice to the man but there is one thing left for me to say:

Thank you, John for welcoming me into your family and allowing me to marry your daughter.

Goodnight Granddad, sleep well you have deserved it.

Nan and Granddad
What do you look like?
Nanny and Granddad
With Harvey at the Seaside
Lucinda and John
John and Harvey
Granddad’s glasses
Red Nose Day
Father and Daughter

Please feel free to pop over to John’s Muchloved site where you can share your own thoughts and tributes, or simply light a candle in memory of Granddad.

Welcome to 2014

Baggie

As we teeter on the edge of (OK, toppled headlong into) a new year (a new year that will see Lucinda and I celebrate a decade together) it is traditional to look back on the year just gone and look forward to the next.  What a year 2013 has been!  Probably the single most eventful year we have known as a family.  Yes, other years have had big events: births, deaths, marriages, holidays, big birthdays, house moves and new jobs but this year has definitely has had them all (apart from the new jobs! – although work did relocate; does that count?)

At the start of 2013 I made some predictions of what we were expecting to look forward to this year and it was already looking busy; not only did they all come to fruition, fate threw a few more in for good measure.  Hence why this site has seen a record-breaking number of updates and a record number of visits, well I do have to keep you all informed don’t I?  And seemingly you are interested.  Or is it just the photos?

So what were the big events of 2013 and what have we learnt?

Obviously the biggest event of the Bagnall year was the birth of our third child and first son.  Ezra John (named after his Grandfathers) was born a week before my 40th birthday.  Now whether it is because he is a boy; or whether it is because he is a third child or whether simply it is because every child is different but he seems to be far more relaxed than either of his sisters.  Amélie had an excuse with her Milk Protein intolerance and we probably spoilt Éowyn, especially initially as we were learning to be parents (and still are!), but he has been the easiest to get to sleep, he cries the least and apart from an aversion to lumpy food has not shown any dislike to his meals.  And although it is a new skill for Lucinda and I to master, juggling the needs of three children, the most important detail is that all three of them are healthy.  Even Amélie’s milk protein intolerance has seemingly lessened.

So with three children our home in Stanwell Moor finally felt a little on the small side.  Thus we decided to make the tough decision to leave the moor, the village that Lucinda has lived all her life!  It did not take us too long to find a house that we both liked.  However the course of house buying ne’er runs smooth.  So let me give you a précis:

Found house made offer – offer rejected; Vendors found house so offered house at a lower price if we could proceed – we can’t proceed as we had no buyer;  We found buyers but so did our vendors and their new buyers offered more that we could afford – we proceeded with our sale; The new buyers chain began to fail so we offered an improved offer (though lower than the other buyers) – the vendors decided to proceed with us.

So far so good – then the twist began.  The government formed an Airports Commission to look into the requirements for expanding capacity at the UK airports and invited proposals from interested parties.  BAA operate Heathrow Airport and one (two) of their three (four) proposals for the expansion of the UK’s busiest airports involved the building of a third (fourth) runway over the village of Stanwell Moor.  This puts a bit of a dampener over the future of a new home and hence our buyers pulled out.

This left us with a dilemma: go back to square one, find a new buyer that didn’t care that their house may not be there in the near future or find a third alternative.  The third alternative was found and now we are the proud owners of a new house and landlords (with tenants!) of our old house.  That certainly wasn’t the plan at the start of 2013 but as we enter 2014 that is where we are.  Will we still be there in 2015?  More than probably, indeed we plan to be in our current abode until we retire and move to the seaside!

Both of those changes to Bagnall family life eclipse the other differences the year has brought: a new car (our 7 seater Ford S-Max) and a new place of work (same company just different premises).

It has been a very important year in the life of our oldest child.  Éowyn not only had the upheaval of moving home (and we kept both Éowyn and Amélie across the notion of moving from the onset including taking them around the house and asking if they liked it and which room they would like as their bedroom) but she also started full-time education.  It was confirmed in mid-april that Éowyn would be going to our first choice school, a decision that was fraught with conflicting emotions.  On one hand, it is a well equipped school, with a new head with lots of new ideas and has had a recent injection of cash; on the other it has a bad reputation and is now far from our new home.

The decision has been made and although we and not too obstinate that we would not consider moving Éowyn at the moment she is loving school.  She loves her teacher Miss Finbow, she has a new best friend and most important of all she is learning.  Her reading and writing is coming along in leaps and bounds and we, as parents, are actively encouraged to help as she gets homework twice a week.

2013 was a big year in Amélie’s development too.  Amélie started pre-school at a private nursery on the grounds of Éowyn’s school (makes dropping off so much easier – and a consideration if we are ever to move schools).  After a bumpy start and lots of tears (Éowyn was the same if you recall) she now runs down the path to school and sometimes forgets to give her dad a kiss before running into the classroom.  It is comforting to know that both of our children enjoy their respective places of education especially with Lucinda returning to work.  We just need to find somewhere for Ezra to spend those days.

2013 also reminded us of the circle of life.  At the beginning of the year we welcomed Ezra into our family and at the end of the year we said goodbye to my Nan.  She was the last of her generation and although she had been ill for a long time her passing was still a shock and obviously upsetting.  The comfort that we have is that she met her first Great-Grandson, that her close family were there in her final hours and her suffering is no more.  She has left us some great memories, more than a handful of quirks and a wardrobe of knitted jumpers!  Sleep well Nan.

One prediction that disappointingly didn’t come to pass was comet ISON.  Even in the days leading up to its perihelion (closest approach to the Sun) we were hoping for a spectacular astronomical display with possibly the brightest comet for a generation.  Unfortunately like an empyrean Icarus it flew too close to the sun and was destroyed and thus became possibly the only disappointment that 2013 brought.

So, all things considered, 2013 was a good year that brought many changes to this enclave of the Bagnall name.  (And I didn’t even mention the fact that both Lucinda and I celebrated our 40th birthdays!)  Hopefully after such a busy year you will find it in your hearts to forgive us if we hope for a quieter 2014.  Life will change to a new pattern in April when Lucinda returns to work but whatever else happens will be a surprise since the only other plan we have is to finally unpack all our boxes and settle into our new home.  I leave you with this toast to the coming year:

Here’s to the bright New Year
And a fond farewell to the old;
Here’s to the things that are yet to come
And to the memories that we hold.

Peace and Love

Baggie

PS If you are into your geeky stats then this page is for you (click here).  Also, I have updated a few things in the background which shouldn’t affect you, my dear readers, but you will notice a couple of new widgets in the sidebar to the right.  So in addition to seeing the last three update titles and the current favourites there is a form to subscribe to the website so that you will receive an e-mail whenever there is an update.

The Bagnall Family - Christmas Tree Decoration
The Bagnall Family – Christmas Tree Decoration